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Poddington-on-Slossip: Characters

Prunella Chegwidden



Naturally buxom and curvacious, Prunella Chegwidden has never been a woman to downplay her God-given endowments by wearing dresses that are modest or concealing. No indeed! Instead, her personal style celebrates her bounteous cleavage and backside by favoring plunging necklines and rakish dresses that are just a *wee* bit too tight. It's true however, that she'll never see 35 again, and since that pox epidemic sometime back, she's been forced to employ artificial means of maintaining her dewy complexion. Recently, she's taken a fancy to colouring her previously brown tresses a fiery shade of henna "to match my blazing passion dearie!" Of course every woman has her own favorite perfume and if the wind is right, townspeople two blocks away can catch a whiff of Prunella's "Forbidden Kisses" by Lanvin.


Sweet, perky, but not exactly 'the sharpest knife in the drawer', Prunella Hocking had always been quite the Poddington standard for beauty in her youth and she intends to keep up that title. As a girl, half the lads were after her and her father made sure he picked the one with the best prospects, not trusting such an important decision to his social butterfly of a daughter. "Reads far too many of those dreadful romance stories. Fills her head with stuff and nonsense they do," the old man grumbled. "Need someone with a good head on his shoulders to look after my sweet little Pruney, by thunder!" Roger Chegwidden fit the bill nicely. Good-looking and romantic enough for Pruney, he became a partner in the family clothing business and worked hard to keep his lovely, giggling bride in style. After Prunella's father died, the business was his. Pruney had the nose for fashion (it being perpetually in magazines) and Roger had the business savvy to reproduce them at low cost.

This is not to say Pruney didn't have some other real talents. Always eager to keep her sweet Roger happy, (she read all of the books on how to get and keep a husband), she lived by the saying 'a way to a man's heart is through his stomach.' Prunella was quite the cook, never failing to take the blue ribbon at local competitions. That is of course, until that fateful day when alcohol became a popular ingredient in the entries! But let us forget that sad, sad defeat in her life. Pruney was never a slender thing and as her cooking skills grew, so did she and Roger. The pleasantly plump couple was always happy. happened. One evening over one of Pruney's sumptuous meals, Roger had a heart attack and died with his face in his mashed potatos. Not much of a surprise considering all those years of rich eating.

Now alone, poor Prunella tries to fill that void in her heart with cooking, bestowing her bounteous knowledge of fashion, makeup, and marriage tips on the young folk, and looking for a new 'Mr. Perfect'. The saucy Miss Prunella (she dropped the 'Widow Chegwidden' name about two months after Roger's funeral) has set her sights on the elusive Poddington baker and former mayor George Banbury, hoping their mutual passion for food would draw them together. Sadly for the buxom Miss Prunella, it seems to be a doomed romance. Banbury can run with amazing speed for such a round little man. But she is a resilient, light-hearted soul and there are plenty of other eligible bachelors in the sea!

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